As my parents and I sat in a conference room of the mortuary planning Mary’s services; my parents decided to have my sister cremated so the process was very new to all of us. One question the representative asked was, “Does your family want to witness the sealing?” Well, my parents and I just looked at each other then all at once answered, “What?” The representative then smiled and started to explain, “After the funeral mass your family would come to the cemetery to have Mary’s remains placed in her niche. After the priest said his final prayers, your family can place the urn on a table and later on in the day a mortuary employee would place Mary in her niche and seal it closed or your family can actually witness the sealing of the niche. Which one would you like to choose?” My parents and I looked at each other and in sequence said, “We’ll witness the sealing.” Driving back home, my parents and I talked about the to options that were presented at the end. We all agreed that neither of us would feel comfortable just leaving Mary on a table all alone, it felt just too venerable.
The day was so bright and warm; the sky was a crystal blue as we made our way to the church. Inside the church it was freezing and cold as friends and family filled it to celebrate Mary’s funeral mass. When the funeral mass was being planned out, my mom and I wanted to focus the funeral mass based on love and the resurrection of Christ. It made us feel some comfort to know that even though Mary was not with us now, we will one day be all reunited again and our love for her would always be.
So, after the Mary’s funeral mass, my brothers made sure that everyone who attended the service had a map to where the cemetery was located and we all drove off.
From Monterey Park to East Los Angeles really wasn’t too far of a drive but it felt like forever on that morning of November 12, 2010. As I drove my parents and Mary’s urn, I felt that I was never going to get to the cemetery.
I knew it would be the first and last time my sister Mary would be riding with us as a family and even though I knew my sister was gone, it sadden my heart.
At Mary’s niche, there was a small table with a dark red burgundy cloth over it. Mary’s urn was placed on the table and a picture of her was placed underneath. This was a beautiful picture of Mary; she looks so content with out a worry in the world. The bright red frame surrounding her picture had enough room for family and friends to sign it and let Mary know how much they loved her.
After the priest finished praying and handed over the crucifix to my parents, it was done. The moment had come, the moment were we had to say good-bye to Mary. As one of my brother’s look for the mortuary employee to seal Mary’s niche, others started to head towards their cars. One of my dad’s cousins suggests for my parents to go home and he would stay to make sure the niche was sealed. My parents agree because they wanted to greet and thank the family and friends that were heading towards their home for attending Mary's services. I looked at my dad’s cousin and asked if I could stay with him then asked my parents if they were okay. My dad smiled and said” Okay Mija you stay if you wan to, okay?” “I’ll be here Dad”, I said.
As my dad’s cousin and I sat waiting for the mortuary employee to come and I started to get anxious. I just wanted to put my sister to rest, to her final rest. She had suffered so much and for so long that the last few minutes of waiting for a mortuary employee seemed like an eternity to me.
Finally one employee came followed by another a few minutes later. They had a wooden crate with wheels and rolled it in front of my sister’s niche. They matched the card with my sister’s information and carefully and respectively placed Mary in her niche. They then closed it and put a seal around the small plastic door and with a putty knife, smoothed the sealing. Then, the two men placed the granite slab back on top of Mary’s niche. “It’s done, it’s finished,” I thought to myself. Mary is finally home and I felt so relieved. Mary is not longer in pain, scared, suffering, hot with fever, cold with chills or feeling alone or abandon but now is truly happy in her eternal life. Mary is now in a place were I know and believe she will be loved in a way she could have never imaged. Thank you Jesus for embracing and surrounding my sister Mary with your love and assuring us that Mary is in a much better place. To my sister Mary: Just know Mamas that even though you are at a new place, you will always have a special place in my heart.
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